In this podcast 14 year old, Ocean Steenkamp,ย gives us a glimpse into the tumultuous world of Teenage Desire and Fertility.
Teenage fertility is an issue that has received and continues to receive substantial attention worldwide. Much of this attention has focused primarily on teenage girls and has been concerned with preventing or mitigating the impact of pregnancy. Very little attention has been paid to boys. Similarly, little attention has been paid to the desires of teenagers.
It is because I listened to it that I am having this conversation :). It is about the law but more importantly about the development stages of young girls and boys and how we should instead support them ๐
The most important thing is to have good communication with our children. Maybe they wont talk to their parents, but rather talk to an aunt or someone else. Its important to listen to them, and at least tell them that they have to protect themselves…
If they want to have sex, they will do it even if we think its wrong. The most important thing for me is that my teenager know that I will be here for him no matter what he does, then maybe if he believes in that he wants to listen and take my advise…
I hope you all will take time to actually listen to the radio story, it was produced based on the research journal articles from Agenda Feminist Media’s “Teenage Fertility and Desire.” that’s real research done with real people like you and me (and younger).
We have both just made a choice we are individually comfortable with, why don’t we allow young people to do the same?
I’m not going to discuss my sex life.
I love this discussion ๐ “Teenagers don’t have the capacity to make decisions” how do you prove this? Perhaps they don’t have the capacity to make the decisions we expect them to? But still telling. I am sure all that girls and boys who experience early pregnancy’s parents, community leaders, educators, etc have told them not to have sex… without discussing with them? I first had sex at the age of 16 and there was nothing wrong with it. Why, because I was much better off in that I could talk openly to the people I surrounded myself with. My friends who were doing peer education with me, my mentors, my family, etc. Had they held back, I probably wouldn’t have used a condom the first time i had sex. That is my experience, what is yours when you were 15? Let’s talk about it? Why not?
We TELL people to stay away from lots of things. Why should sexuality be any different?
Yes, of course hugging is safer. Of course touching is safer. I’m willing to bet plenty of people DO tell teenagers about the alternatives.
Teenagers don’t have the capacity to make decisions such as this all by themselves. Their brains and bodies are still developing. Their parent/s or guardian/s should guide them and, in doing so, TELL them what to do and what not to do.
But that is exactly the point… we always TELLING them. Never communicating. And when we TELL them, we only TELL them one option – don’t have sex… we don’t, for example, share other options of sex that are much safer and less risky: masturbation, touching, hugging, etc. When you tell someone not to have sex, you may as well tell them not to eat or drink when they feel the need to do so… but we don’t do that, do we? There is nothing embarrassing about sex or the feelings associated with it so why hide it? Either way, we don’t decide so we can’t tell them we can only talk about it by sharing the facts. Talk to a 13 year old today and listen to their real challenges before we decide what is right and wrong – because :), we don’t…
Yes, some young people will have sex no matter what. But it’s up to us to teach young people they should wait until they’re in a committed relationship.
No matter what we do or say (even if we stand on our heads), young people will have sex! No matter what we think is wrong for them and right for them, they will make their own choices. It doesn’t mean because I don’t understand something, that it is wrong when someone else does it. How many parents talk positively to their children about sex? How many nurses at a clinic takes the opportunity to talk to a teenager about sex choices when visiting a clinic as oppose to discriminating the teenager for getting a condom at the clinic? I am an individual, so you are. I have right to go with my good given feelings and curiosity (and sexual experimentation is one of them), something no other human has a right to decide for me. Instead of saying they shouldn’t do it, maybe as reasonable, rational adults, we should decide to give them the information as openly as possible and then allow teenagers to make their own decisions. There are many societies where this has proven to work… Maybe we should ask why it worked?
Teenage pregnancies and STDs are two good reasons why teenagers shouldn’t be having sex.
Why shouldn’t they? More importantly, who gets to decide? And where did that person who believes he/she does get the divine authority to make a decision for someone else’s life?
Teens shouldn’t be having sex.
I say we campaign for 22 million young people to have sex… then change the law ๐ I really think our government is losing focus… more scary than that is that you see these trends happening more and more in Africa. Leaders are attempting to make the feelings, exploration and experimentation of young people policy. Instead of controlling things, the ultimate desire is to control people. You do not solve high pregnancies by telling young people NOT to have sex… you provide them with frank, comprehensive sex and sexuality information and deal with the social and structural factors (poor quality of education, poverty, etc.) to address the problem. Those who put in place these laws forget the fact that the only reason they have that opportunity to do so or why they exist is because their parents had unprotected sex. If having sex is a crime, then our existence must be criminal, yes?